BEST Ballpark Burger EVER

I was glancing through the metro express paper the other morning and came across the most disturbing news. And I'm not referring to the waging war in the Middle East, gasoline prices, or the fact that Britney Spears will bear another child...

A St. Louis minor league baseball team has introduced at its concession stands a bacon cheeseburger served between a Krispy Kreme donut, WCBS-TV reported. Gateway Grizzlies concession operators say the $4.50, 1,000-calorie "Krispy-Kreme Cheeseburger" is not meant to be eaten with ketchup; fans say it's better than expected.

Wait, wait, sorry I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. Did we not learn anything from the Burger King Breakfast sandwich that tried to cram every breakfast option into a single food item? -- pancakes, syrup, eggs, bacon, sausage, potatoes, a mild coronary, quadruple bypass, diabetes… It really begs the question why our country is obese.

Well, in case you do not make it to St. Louis this summer and you want to partake in the chest pains that will certainly ensue, try this recipe on for size:

1. Slice a Krispy Kreme glazed doughnut in half and grill both of the cut sides.
   Okay, that sounds reasonable
2. At the same time, grill a hamburger patty and two slices of bacon.
   Also reasonable
3. Top the patty with sharp Cheddar cheese and the bacon
   Chest pains starting
4. Slide the patty on top of the half of the doughnut, making sure the cut side is on the outside.
   Wait! Stop right there!
5. Top with the other half of doughnut, cut side facing up
   Can't breathe, can't breathe!
6. No ketchup or mustard needed
   As if you had to ask.

St. Louis… they love them some golden "arches."